![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
A acouple of time recently, I've found myself thinking, "Oh, that's OK, because *tonight* she'll probably be home, and we can do something together."
Hrm. :-\
Hrm. :-\
I followed a link to a brief piece by a British Army padre who's been serving in Afghanistan. It was a story, a couple of stories, about the men he's serving with, but it ended with these observations about the value of conversation and reflection.
I have seen too often people’s lives held captive by a single event. It can be that a few minutes, or seconds even, can be the reference point from which they view themselves and the world, far beyond the reach you might expect.
Talking about it seems to help though; friends and colleagues can bring a greater, wider perspective to something that could otherwise become all-encompassing.
Sometimes the talk can turn to God and faith and purpose, but often it doesn’t. The process, however, is cathartic and always worthwhile. It is a funny thing, but in a world that seems so enthusiastic about the gossip of ‘he said this’ and ‘she said that’ and of the cringing details of celebrities’ lives, I wonder whether what we could really do with is talking a little bit more about our own experiences; how we have seen things that affect us; how perhaps our perspective is not the only one; how we feel as a result.
It is the essential process of knowing and being known, of relationship, of feeling what we do and who we are is valued; which is, of course, also at the heart of a living, active faith.
a day for regret
Jan. 9th, 2013 04:21 pmAt some point this morning (I think when I was putting on my socks), I paused to think , "Hmmm, five years ago, I was getting ready to get married." *sigh* What a long, strange trip that turned out to be.
Then, this afternoon, I was reminded of a friend, the Lioness, I made about a year before that, someone I never met in person because she lived out in Washington State. She was cool--smart, funny, self deprecating, exciting, geeky in just the right way. We had a lot of interests in common, and a lot of things that she was into that I wasn't were still very neat (like art metal-smithing and SCA fighting). But I was always going to be the sort of guy friend that one can talk to about anything because you never think of him "like that". Partly because I was far away, sure. But also because she seemed to have a knack for finding just the right asshat to fall in love with--the sort of guy who's going to be all charming and just a little bit of a bastard--until you get to know him really well, at which point you find out that he's actually mostly bastard.
I've run into a number of women who seem to have an instinct for finding the guy who is going to hurt them and picking him out of a field of other guys who are much less likely to but, I guess, also don't have some kind of edginess, some element of "devil may care", some bravado that turns all the switches to 11. At least long enough for the woman in question to lose her heart. A length of time that also seems to be bad boy's attention span, or boredom threshold.
I miss my friend the Lioness. :-(
Then, this afternoon, I was reminded of a friend, the Lioness, I made about a year before that, someone I never met in person because she lived out in Washington State. She was cool--smart, funny, self deprecating, exciting, geeky in just the right way. We had a lot of interests in common, and a lot of things that she was into that I wasn't were still very neat (like art metal-smithing and SCA fighting). But I was always going to be the sort of guy friend that one can talk to about anything because you never think of him "like that". Partly because I was far away, sure. But also because she seemed to have a knack for finding just the right asshat to fall in love with--the sort of guy who's going to be all charming and just a little bit of a bastard--until you get to know him really well, at which point you find out that he's actually mostly bastard.
I've run into a number of women who seem to have an instinct for finding the guy who is going to hurt them and picking him out of a field of other guys who are much less likely to but, I guess, also don't have some kind of edginess, some element of "devil may care", some bravado that turns all the switches to 11. At least long enough for the woman in question to lose her heart. A length of time that also seems to be bad boy's attention span, or boredom threshold.
I miss my friend the Lioness. :-(
(no subject)
Jun. 16th, 2011 12:49 pmIt was three months ago last night that I first met ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
astrongteacher for drinks and dinner at Rosa Mexicano.
I can't believe how far we have come since then. We've courted and fallen in love. We've kissed and hugged. We've fought and made up. We've met each others' friends and (some of our) relatives. We've shared meals and chores, sunny mornings and dark and stormy nights. We've travelled (and failed to travel) together.My cats have accepted her as part of the clan, and vice versa. We've shared pipe-dreams and started making serious plans.
On the one hand, three months is no time at all. On the other hand, it feels as if we have known each other forever.
Good times.
astrongteacher for drinks and dinner at Rosa Mexicano.I can't believe how far we have come since then. We've courted and fallen in love. We've kissed and hugged. We've fought and made up. We've met each others' friends and (some of our) relatives. We've shared meals and chores, sunny mornings and dark and stormy nights. We've travelled (and failed to travel) together.My cats have accepted her as part of the clan, and vice versa. We've shared pipe-dreams and started making serious plans.
On the one hand, three months is no time at all. On the other hand, it feels as if we have known each other forever.
Good times.
and another
Sep. 25th, 2009 08:09 amYour result for The Best Personality Type for You Test...
INFJ - The Counselor
You scored 50 I versus E, 40 N versus S, 40 F versus T, and 60 J versus P!
Your ideal romantic partner is known as the counselor. This type makes a supportive and insightful romantic partner, encouraging their mates to have dreams and work hard to make those dreams come true. Because they are so creative, they have a wealth of ideas to help them toward those goals. They need harmony so much that they are driven to resolve conflict quickly, as long as the terms don't violate their strong ethics. They feel the most appreciated when their partners admire their creativity, trust their inspirations, and respect their values. It is also vitally important that their partners be open and emotionally available - in other words, that they be willing to share themselves completely.
The group summary: idealists (NF)
The type summary: INFJ
The group summary: idealists (NF)
The type summary: INFJ
sing it, Cat Stevens
Jun. 26th, 2009 09:12 pm Another Saturday Friday night and I ain't got nobody....
...being alone sucks. Just sayin'...
...being alone sucks. Just sayin'...
this surprises me not at all
Jun. 12th, 2009 01:46 pmThe Five Love Languages
My primary love language is probablyPhysical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.
Complete set of results
| Physical Touch: | 11 | |
| Quality Time: | 8 | |
| Words of Affirmation: | 7 | |
| Acts of Service: | 3 | |
| Receiving Gifts: | 1 |
Information
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.Take the quiz
well, there it is
Apr. 21st, 2006 09:08 pmAmy and I broke up tonight.
I'll probably feel like talking about it at excruitating length later, but right now I just want to sit in my rooms and be sad. We talked, we talked, we talked (this has been goign on for about two weeks), there was anger, there were tears, and there was a lot of hugging each other and not wanting to let go. And now we're apart, we're both miserable, what a great solution.
Good thing it's dark and raining.
I'll probably feel like talking about it at excruitating length later, but right now I just want to sit in my rooms and be sad. We talked, we talked, we talked (this has been goign on for about two weeks), there was anger, there were tears, and there was a lot of hugging each other and not wanting to let go. And now we're apart, we're both miserable, what a great solution.
Good thing it's dark and raining.
